Let the initial shock of loss wear away
Feel the pain but don’t carry it all day.
Allow your mind to instruct
matter of all things –
Have faith in what
your thoughts will bring.

Remember 10% is only developed,
90% has its own agenda.
The powerful reptilian brain can be,
things that undermine reality.

Let go of things you can’t control,
Do not look to others
to make your life feel whole.

Do not share the fleeting moments in your brain.
Practice the silent way of the insane.

Do not fear the reaction to your action.
Do not assume they think like you…
Do not assume they feel like you….
Do not assume they love or care.
Rely on the fact that no one is really there.

Do not share your thoughts lightly,
Keep them locked and hidden.
Do not give away your ideas
or your mission.

If you think to ask
then ask yourself first.
Enjoy your answer
and that will quench your thirst.

Block the noise
Block the message
You are your own being….

Only you know…..




Critical Thinking – Categorical Syllogisms

E Mail #1

Hello Class,

I am sending everyone 4 e-mails. I am breaking them up so I don’t jumble a lot of information together. I want to help you study by breaking down the Exam. If anything I write seems incorrect, please let’s discuss it. I am giving you notes based on HOW I UNDERSTAND. I want to help, but I don’t want to confuse anyone, so if this helps you great. If it confuses you, study your own way, but make sure you study for this exam! I think the most important trick is to understand the Patterns. Once I saw the Patterns emerge today, everything seemed a little easier to do. I couldn’t understand any of this material until today. It really drove me crazy and made me anxious and depressed…so if I can overcome that, I think we all can!

If you have e-mails of anyone who missed todays class, I would forward them all of the 4 emails I am sending you, so they have the benefit of knowing what was discussed in the class today. Please pass this information along!

Class Four Recap

We found out the whole class, every team, failed the take home fallacy worksheet. She gave us the time to re-do the test, and earn 4 points (if we got all the fallacies correct this time). Anyone who wasn’t in class will have an opportunity to do the same thing on their take home test, in order to earn 75% on that take home test. I can discuss the take home test with anyone who needs to take it on the Fifth Class.

The class mainly missed these fallacies:

Appeal to Authority

Contrary to the Fact

False Dilemma

Hasty Generalization

False Analogy

Post hoc ergo propter hoc


Contrary to the Fact

We all did OK on Appeal to Ignorance (Ad ignorantium), Two Wrongs, Attacking the Person, Slippery slope, Appeal to Emotion,

Equivocation was the fallacy that was not used!

Anyone who missed class today will have a chance to earn up to 4 points only by getting all of the answers correct. I have just provided you all of the hints provided us in class. If anyone who wasn’t in class needs to discuss this, e-mail me to set up a time to call each other and we will talk about it over the phone.

If you earn all 4 points, it will only bring your grade on the Fallacy take home test up to a 75%


I’m highlighting things in Black that I am sure are on the FINAL EXAM.

The final exam is 25 questions, broken up into 3 segments.

1. Categorical Syllogisms

2. Hypothetical Syllogisms

3. Finish the sentence syllogism…..(categorical)

Here are some rules:

1. All valid syllogisms must have one affirmative premise.

2. Syllogisms are only valid if the conclusion has to be true based on the premise.

3. All valid syllogisms must have one universal premise-(ALL) Example: All people are homo-sapiens.

Deductive Reasoning: You have a Known set of facts. Truth. Validity-refers to structure (Do the premises prove the conclusion) Soundness & Acceptability.

I don’t know how soon I will send out the next two e-mails, it is going to take me some time to re-write my notes in an instructional manner. 
I do not know the order of the exam….but for purposes of breaking the 3 different subjects apart, I am calling this Part 1.
I’m highlighting things in Red that I am sure are on the FINAL EXAM.
Part 1 of EXAM:
From Chapter 9 pages 137-138 show other patterns that show up.
Categorical Syllogisms:
A categorical syllogism is a form of argument that contains statements) called categorical propositions) that either affirm or deny that a subject is a member of a certain class (category) or has a certain property.”
Determine valid or invalid-
Here is ONE basic pattern of a Categorical Syllogism: this will appear at least one time on the test in some way (either in pattern or direct example, I don’t know).
All X’s are Y’s
Z is an X
Therefore, Z is a Y
Pattern of Categorical Syllogisms
  1. Major Term: (This is usually found in the first line of the Categorical Syllogism, on the right hand side.) e.g. Our students are intelligent.  (MAJOR TERM)
  2. Find out what the MIDDLE TERM is. The middle term will duplicate itself in line ONE and line TWO.  Once you know what the Middle Term is, you can logically deduct what the major term is in the first line, and what the minor term is in the second line! e.g. Robert is one of our students.
Our students are intelligent.
Robert is one of our students.
*The MAJOR TERM in line one has to be intelligent (found on the right of line one)
*The MINOR TERM always on line TWO is not students (Middle Term) so it must be Robert.
*The conclusion now must read with the
MINOR becomes the SUBJECT in the CONCLUSION.
            No geese are felines.
            Some birds are geese.
            Therefore, some birds are not felines.
Now break the syllogism down.
LINE ONE: Since Geese is repeated in line one and line two, it must be the Middle Term.  So in line one the Major term is: Felines.
LINE TWO: Some birds are geese.  Geese is the middle term (appears in line one) so SOME BIRDS, must be the Minor Term: Some birds.
LINE THREE: To be VALID, it must have the Minor term as the Subject and the Major term as the predicate. Also watch the ALL & SOME!
Therefore, (minor term) some birds are NOT (to relate to the universal term in line one NO GEESE) felines (MAJOR TERM).
UNIVERSAL STATEMENTS IS ON THE TEST.  There has to be at least One universal statement seen when words like ALL OR NONE  is in the syllogism.
All zebras are striped animals.
No zebras are polar bears.
Therefore, no polar bears are striped animals.
Let’s walk through this:
The Middle term is Zebra’s but the universal term says ALL in the first line and NO in the second line!
The Major term is striped animals in line one because zebras is middle term.
The minor term is polar bears in line two because zebras is the middle term.
The conclusion must be written with the Minor term as the SUBJECT and the Major Term on the PREDICATE.
Therefore, (minor term) no polar bears are striped animals (major term).
So the problem is the universal statements are not matching up….. since NO goes with the minor term and ALL is in the major term, NO & ALL are opposite of each other, they are Negative, they do not match up….
All clowns are funny individuals.
Some sad people are clowns.
Therefore, some sad people are funny individuals.
Let’s walk through this:
1.  CLOWNS repeats itself in line one and line two so it can not be in the conclusion, we know this is the MIDDLE TERM.
2.  In line one the MAJOR TERM must be FUNNY INDIVIDUALS.
3.  In the second line the MINOR TERM must be sad people.
So the last line must have the MINOR TERM as the SUBJECT, and the MAJOR TERM as the predicate, and watch the UNIVERSAL STATEMENTS ALL & SOME.
Therefore, some sad people (minor term) are funny individuals (major term.)
Look at it:  The minor term is the subject and in the right place, and the word SOME coincides with SOME in line two.  The Universal statements match.
Some sticky substances are yucky things.
All taffy is a sticky substance.
Therefore, some taffy is a yucky thing.               
Let’s walk through it:
MIDDLE TERM is sticky substance because it appears in line one and line two.  So therefore it can not appear in line 3.
Line one’s MAJOR TERM then must be yucky things.
Line two’s MINOR TERM then is taffy.
NOTICE: Universal statement ALL in line two.
Therefore, some taffy (MINOR TERM) is a yucky thing (MAJOR TERM).
The minor term is in the right place and the major term is in the right thing, BUT the Universal Statement doesn’t match.  In line two it says: ALL TAFFY, so when it says SOME TAFFY it doesn’t match! 
Therefore: INVALID
All items made of gold are expensive items.
Some rings are items made of gold.
Therefore, some rings are expensive items.
Let’s walk through it:
The MIDDLE TERM that appears in line one and line two is made of gold.
In Line One the Major term can be found on the right: expensive items.
In Line Two the Middle term must be: some rings.
Therefore, some rings (middle term becomes the subject) are expensive items (major term became the predicate). The UNIVERSAL TERM SOME matches. 
Therefore, some rings are expensive items.  THIS IS VALID!
Now, without any notes print out this portion and practice if these are valid or invalid by yourself! Circle one and go back over the answers above when you are done!  Practice, Practice, Practice!
All X’s are Y’s
Z is an X
Therefore, Z is a Y
Our students are intelligent.
Robert is one of our students.
Therefore, Robert is intelligent.
No geese are felines.
Some birds are geese.
Therefore, some birds are not felines.
All zebras are striped animals.
No zebras are polar bears.
Therefore, no polar bears are striped animals.
All clowns are funny individuals.
Some sad people are clowns.
Therefore, some sad people are funny individuals.
Some sticky substances are yucky things.
All taffy is a sticky substance.
Therefore, some taffy is a yucky thing.               
All items made of gold are expensive items.
Some rings are items made of gold.
Therefore, some rings are expensive items.

E-Mails between Crop Circle Connectors

NOVEMBER 16, 2001 – I receive this e-mail

Greetings, Aiych –

i’m Peter’s Platonic Circle-buddy … 😉
and as i used to live in Port Angeles, my ears perked up when you
mentioned in yr post to him that there was a Formation there ‘recently’ …

do you have any additional info, any newspaper clippings/fotos/referrals
to anyone who you know visited the Formation? can you tell me precisely
where the Circle was?

now, in Chehalis in ’94 and ’96 there were Formations (wch i documented
aerially and with wheat samples), and there were two in Adna (near
Chehalis) in ’94 both of wch i worked with Dr Gerald Hawkins on the math
— ’94AdnaI was the first US Formation with confirmed diatonic ratio;
and of course in ’93 the Kennewick Formation (wch i aerially documented
and sampled for Dr L) started everything off, was the first Pictogram
the States had received (to the best i’ve been able to confirm); and ’98
Eltopia (wch i aerially and lay documented) and WhidbeyIsle (wch i tried
to find but was directed instead to lodged fields) each received one.
but i left PortAngeles area and haven’t heard about any WA or OR
Formations this year.

if you can share whatever info you may have with me, i’d be most appreciative!


– ilyes

“One who knows the secret of Sound knows the Mystery of
the Universe.” — Hazrat Inayat Khan

– ilyes
National Coordinator
CropCircle Research International

>visit my HomePage – and my Monograph,
“The Transmission of a CropCircle”

explore The CropCircle Connector’s International Archives:
http://www.cropcircleconnector.com -> HomePage
http://www.cropcircleconnector.com/1999/1999.html -> ’99 Circles

NOVEMBER 16, 2001 –
I send a news link article from King 5 news that is no longer available for link but this is the text.

Strange formations in the fields

Reported by John Stofflet, Evening Magazine

A strange formation appeared overnight in a Northwest field. No one has been able to explain how the huge patterns appeared. Some say it’s the work of extraterrestrials or a spiritual power. Others say it’s another chapter in the hoax story of the century.

A Port Angeles woman is devoting much of her life investigating these strange formations here in the Northwest and around the world.

For more than a decade, people around the world have been fascinated by reports of thousands of crop circle formations that have appeared in farm fields everywhere from England to right here in the Northwest.

While some formations are believed to have been made by people, in many cases scientists have been unable to explain what’s created them.

A Northwest woman who is devoting much of her life to crop circle research says there is more and more evidence these formations have been sent from a power or entity yet unknown.

Ilyes of Port Angeles, is the national coordinator of the Center for Crop Circle Studies in the U.S. She’s spent years researching these bizarre formations that seem to appear out of nowhere overnight.

Ilyes has been interested in crop circles since 1985, and has been traveling to England since 1991 to study them.

Some scientists believe the formations are the result of a simple, but unexplained natural phenomenon. Other people believe extraterrestrial beings are involved.

Ilyes has her own theory. She feels ancient spiritual energies are the source of the circles.

“I believe that these circle makers are separate consciousnesses that have come together over eons and eons and eons. Very loving, a very high order intelligence,” she said.

Ilyes and thousands of others, believe the formations may convey important messages and a positive energy.

Skeptics say that’s new-age hogwash. They say the real circle makers are human pranksters.

Ilyes says her visits to the formations have led her to evidence that could prove these formations are not human made. Nodes in the wheat appear to have been blown out by a powerful force – not something she believes is caused by trampling of human feet.

Ilyes says researchers have been monitoring the fields, watching for people making the formations and have caught no one. Nor, she says, can any one explain how a person would have the time to intricately weave the wheat together the way it is often found.

Skeptics continue to insist publicity-seeking pranksters, or people interested in boosting tourism are making the circles. Ilyes says her purpose is not to prove them wrong but to simply offer what she believes to be the truth.

She says the sense of peace and the positive energy she and many others experience when they enter a crop formation is reason enough to continue to dedicate her life to the formations – reason to believe something powerful is growing from these fields.

While some people have admitted to making some of these formation, Ilyes says they may have just been trying to get into the media spotlight and says you can’t explain the many other formations no one’s claimed responsibility for.

NOVEMBER 17, 2001 – I receive this reply

Greetings again, Aiych –

that Formation with article is of ’93Cheesefoot Head, in Hants UK …
400′ across, if i recollect rightly … got to fly it and visit on the
ground, too … Peter’s got lovely aerial of it, as well …

what a surprise to see that article!  it’s a recent one, sure’nuf,
judging by the date (wch is what REALLY confounds me!) but i was on
Evening Magazine (on KING5 TV/Seattle) well over A DECADE ago!  i’m
tickled that they’ve Webbed it!  🙂

thanks VERY much for sharing it, Aiych … i can EASILY understand yr
confusion — and MINE, too!  whooEEE!  out of left field!  well, into my
digital album with it!  🙂

muchly appreciated,

     – ilyes

yo:  if you’d like a calendar of the ’95 Formations, send me a snailmail
and i’ll be happy to get one off to you as a thankyou  🙂  (NOT YOU,
PeterLuv!  😉

——– Original Message ——–
From: Peter Sorensen

Odd that the article was dated last month when the WA formaiton
was in 1993 or 94, and the photo was not of the WA formation
either — it’s one from the UK, in 1994 or 95.

Well, let’s just say the news twists things around a bit doesn’t it ….. but why?


In the time I have today,
I ask did I give back to society
and in my life I dare to say
that there are few I know more sacrificing.

A lot of people come to me,
about the things they’re feeling,
they cry, and I say try,
not to be so crazy.

The pressures of life are all but understood
when it comes to be,
the people I learn from and the people I love,
as their life unfolds and is free.

Published in: on September 17, 2009 at 5:26 AM  Comments (1)  
Tags: , , ,

Slaying The Monster

As I drove through the desert – I contemplated this day.
An unsettled fear – more was coming my way.
There was no where to run, hide, or escape
I was on a collision for another mental rape.
I wanted to destroy my cards, GPS and phone
but I knew that would mean I could never go home.

I had broken down and acted out of my mind,
If I did it again I wouldn’t be treated so kind.
I was just one of the three blind mice,
I could get away with it once, but never twice.
The constant attacks were breaking me down,
The real problems came once no one was around.

The computers were taken over and disabled.
My home was a fortress and nothing was stable.
Too stubborn to stop working and told
“Don’t touch that phone.”
That’s when I realized that I’m on my own.

My earnest efforts had already been rejected
I reacted to things just as was expected.
Captured in radio silence conditions,
and I was forced to abort my mission.

Broken apart till I had no direction,
under control of only suggestion.
Oh My God, you can’t be serious,
I had no idea why I was being put through this.

Completely cut off from the world that I know,
an unknown commander was running the show.
I was scared that I wouldn’t get out alive….
responding with actions so I could survive.

Maybe I was really losing my mind,
looking for evidence that no one could find.
Warned of destruction as the outcome to be,
A word of fatality, and the blame would be me.

My history was crazy, lessons easy to miss,
I wonder if that was preparation for this.
I was afraid to go to others during the roam,
Worried that I’d bring danger into their home.

I couldn’t talk about what was happening to me,
I didn’t know how to go on to be free.
I reached out one time, please understand….
Backfired till things were more out of hand.

Nothing left to do – face my fear head on,
Nothing left to lose, and I had to be strong.
I found myself driving to think for a bit,
Another warning I saw, and wanted to quit.

I kept trying to tell myself it was all an illusion,
That my mind was just sick creating delusion.
The strangers and I was all who could see,
the things they would do while following me.

I made rash decisions out of sheer panic,
told to calm down and stop acting manic.
“Behave as you would in your normal situation…
keep working without volunteering information.”

I went back to work and what was stolen now back.
Today has arrived and I appear I’m on track.
Just as unexpected when my project was taken,
I’m to say sorry for the delay – and I was mistaken.

What was the reason, the purpose, the plan?
I’ll never know but does my integrity stand?
I fought black and white, and gray was a crime,
I stopped resisting the monster who gave me my time.
What you resist persists, or so I’ve been told…..
I returned to the battle but the trail went cold.

Wrap it up,
move ahead,
don’t look back again,
Embrace the beginning
and fear not the end.

Published in: on September 17, 2009 at 5:14 AM  Comments (1)  
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As you believe

so shall you become

and then the flame

becomes the sun….

so you dance

underneath the moon of understanding…..

and acceptance

of the new dawn…….

Published in: on September 17, 2009 at 5:07 AM  Leave a Comment  
Tags: , , ,


As the sun rises in another land
the warm rays are out of my hand
Your light is my dark
My light is your night
We are just on the other side
Where time arranges our days and lights
the illusionary flight
the dream of life
I have a teetering existence
balancing on the tight rope of insanity
I am consciously unconscious
trying to be present for my life
that lives on without me…..
Published in: on September 17, 2009 at 5:04 AM  Leave a Comment  
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The Lights My Friends

It started when I was a child ….. reoccurring with plenty of years in-between…..establishing normalcy for long periods of forgotten time.


This is a letter I wrote one night to Art Bell:

Sometimes, when I’ve had a cocktail, I want to call
you on the air and tell you this.  I admit I have
tried, but I always get a busy signal.  I am relieved
the next day I didn’t get through.

I want to take you back to my experiences with UFO’s.
I never claimed to see Aliens.  So I want you to
understand that first.

I was traveling by night to go see my grandfather with
my best friend at the time in 1993.  I was taking 8
east through San Diego, somewhat along the border of
Mexico through to Tucson.

There are a lot of closed down air force areas there
and scattered nuclear sites.

As we were driving along a big white light appeared
behind us.  We were not looking for anything at all.
We were going on vacation.

This big white light appeared with some yellow ones on
it’s side.  It came up fast behind us, I was driving
my friend looked behind us and freak-ed…it’s huge
she said, it is so big, like three football fields.  I
didn’t look back.  I didn’t ever speed up.  Just drove

We journeyed along and it would appear and disappear
as we came close to cities and then reappear as we
left them.  The ships would hide in the formation of
the stars above. They would play with us.  IT’s the
only way to describe it. 

We started taking many trips to the desert just to
play with them.  There were times when as many as 50
would appear in a field, doing amazing tricks, just
appearing was amazing.

We would get out of the car and we would chase after
them, and sometimes they would turn around and chase
after us…we would run back to the car screaming,
like little kids.

A shaman once told me we acted like children and
that’s why they were in contact with us.

They seemed to follow along the route of the train
tracks and sometimes it seemed like information was
being thrust-ed into our heads so fast it was like our
synapses were snapping and we were geniuses.  I
remember once the thought came into my head that they
were digging underground and dropping the dirt on the
train (going a certain speed it wouldn’t notice the
weight) and then taking it off and dumping it
somewhere else.

One night, the moon wasn’t there.  Then it was there
bright as could be.  Then it turned into a cone and
then a cheese shape.  It was like a hologram.  It was
like a port-hole.  I wasn’t sure if it was a test
conducted by the military of holograms in the air or

We were made a promise once (in our heads) that they
would not take us on the ship but show us them in the
daylight.  We were on our way back in rush hour
traffic about to hit the 10 freeway into downtown LA.
Keri (my friend) was all pissed off because we hadn’t
been on board yet.  I said, “Don’t you remember, they
aren’t taking us on board, they are showing us them
during the day.”  She said, “Yeah, well they didn’t do
that either.”

All of a sudden behind us in rush hour traffic a
silver ship appeared () like that but horizontal.  It
had many little strands of silver that made it up.  I
said, LOOK!  She looked and said “I missed it!”  I
looked to her driving at the time and there it was on
the side of her I said “There!” and she looked….as
it left us it dissipated from the bottom up, now
looking like () this but slightly angled.

We kept saying, “This has to be on the radio! Everyone
had to have seen it!”  As we approached Hollywood
boulevard or Melrose Blvd., I can’t remember, we saw
the disc circling above us.  We heard screams and
yells on the streets and we said, “Finally people see
it! They really see it!”

When we got there, it was a gay pride parade.

It later circled around our golf course (this is when
I lived in Hancock park) up in the air.  We saw light
forms in the trees and huge spiders we have never seen
came down in 3’s as if to warn us.

Anytime we talked against them they would disappear on
our travels.  One time when I was looking at this huge
craft with a little one attached I was scared they
were going to abduct us.  I wrote a note saying if we
disappeared it was them.  Keri got so mad at me
because they disappeared after I wrote the note.  She
made me throw it away and then they came back.  That
was on a trip to Idaho…we went through Vegas….They
were overhead as huge as can be over Vegas!

One night we went out in the field and these little
lights, I call them probes danced all around our car
and hands.  If anything was making the crop circles, I
always believed it was them.  Some sort of
communication, data retriever, non touchable but solid
light of many red, orange, yellow colors. 

Later, our experiences started to darken.  There were
little mechanical things working on what appeared to
be digging and they had lights on them, as if they
used the lights to not bump into each other.  One
night we went off of Side Winder road.  There was a
pyramid of probes and we were going towards it.  We
found ourself to a flat land over a military type
base.  There was these strange plane/triangle
type machines that filled up with huge gas pumps that
were glowing liquid inside.  They had three lights,
two went on each side of them and one down the middle.
That was during a time of med-fly spray warnings.  Med
fly my ass! A police officer appeared out of nowhere
and cornered us in.  He talked about these two girls
who were there the week before who disappeared …we
had been there the week before.  Our lives were
basically threatened covertly that we would disappear
and die,(by the hands of Mexicans crossing the
boarder, as he put it).

I went back to the desert two years ago, and nothing.
Just one big white light once.  Bummer.

So we have the technology, I can tell the difference
between a military UFO and a real one.  The military
flies in formation, the real one dances with us.

Only Proof Only Proof
Published in: on September 16, 2009 at 8:02 AM  Comments (1)  
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Never to late to learn…..

Good Afternoon members of the administration, distinguished faculty and staff, graduating students and honored guests. I want to start and end with gratitude. Most of us who graduate today could not have reached this point without the patience, encouragement, and love of the most important people in our lives. If you’re the guest of a graduating student, be assured that your influence made today possible. This celebration is as much for you as for the ones who walk away with a diploma. Your faith carried us to the finish line. We will always be grateful.  

Those of us who choose to return to college as adults do so with an added sense of responsibility. Educational success is not a mere academic exercise to those of us who have had to balance classes and homework with family and jobs. Our success as individuals, the example we provide through our hard work, persistence, and dedication to learning can and will affect the lives of those we love. As much as we owe to those who supported us, we also shouldn’t forget the obstacles. The hardships. The events that knocked us down. The people who knocked us down.  Each of us has faced dark moments when this day seemed impossible… not even worth dreaming about. But worthy dreams grow even in darkness. We should pay our thanks to the obstacles in our lives. They proved the value of this dream, strengthened us on this journey, and prepared us to face all that may come.

To the graduates… I say you have proven yourselves. You can work a full-time job, raise a family, and complete a college degree. You have overcome. You have more reason to be confident than most. Be bold. Use that certainty in yourself and your qualifications to get your foot in the door of the career you always wanted. Do not ever let anyone tell you no. Be as determined and diligent as you were when you had weekly papers to turn in. Use those time management skills to improve your lot in life… and most importantly, never stop building on those skills. Never stop learning.

Our new knowledge allows each of us to be more helpful to those around us than we ever were before. Friends and family find our conversations filled with new insight and guidance. Reflect on your contribution to your friends and family before you began college… and consider your contribution now. Ask them if they’ve noticed a change, a transformation. For myself, I’ve found that my eyes no longer gloss over when my father speaks to me about math and science. My friends call me more often than I call them to bounce off ideas and ask what I would do if I was in their situation. In something as minor as watching television, I pick up extra nuances and plot twists that I never would have seen before. Professionally, I’m doing a better job at work. I’m able to adapt with the rapidly changing times and keep pace with advancing technology. I actually consider myself intellectually agile.  Education has taught each of us to take something that is broken, observe it, tear it apart, and put it back together to get it running again… whether it’s a computer… or that most delicate of machinery, a person we care for. Ultimately, education has allowed us to become more valuable to others. But of course, our transformation should extend beyond our personal circles. We should — we must — use our knowledge to contribute to society as well.

Many of us decided to get a degree to increase our earning power… and that’s good. A life of desperation is little benefit to anyone. But the greater wealth comes from sharing what we’ve learned, and using our new skills to contribute to the world at large. This journey to a college degree has transformed us from the curious student to the wise advisor… (But if we’re truly wise, we’ll never stop being the curious student).  And, as promised, I return to gratitude. To our families…you may at times have felt neglected by us as we hit the books and pursued deadlines… but you were never forgotten. You were what kept us going. You were why it mattered that we got it right. Only to our loved ones can we say: you gave us the greatest gift of our journey, you gave us freedom to grow. You sacrificed our time together, leaving us alone to spend an extra 20 hours a week on homework and classes. You weren’t always happy but you were never discouraging. And the person in my life who convinced me to return to school is sitting here today. The Judge told me, “They can never take away your education.” Graduating class…I say to you…your achievement is yours for a lifetime. Be proud of your efforts. You will have success and failure, achievement and sorrow, but your understanding of the world around you… no one can take that away. I honor the staff who facilitated our journey, and I applaud each of you who graduates today for your achievement. May you rise to every occasion, and declare victory in every endeavor. And may you all continue to learn and grow so that each tomorrow that lies ahead is another page in the story of your success.

Published in: on September 16, 2009 at 7:48 AM  Leave a Comment  
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How do you get out of Chapel Perilous?

I was just doing my job, and noticed something awry. I decided to investigate (with the third eye)? I kept digging – running mathematical equations…..every time I brought in help, even more from my life was taken.

I saw the things that were only made for movies. I ran the numbers and came up empty. I cut my hands open and bled without pain. I tore everything apart to find answers in vain. I look at the last thing left I hadn’t opened….a DVD of the movie a Beautiful Mind, that’s when I realized that I had been broken.

I found another writer today “The Poetics of Thought” – The Poetry of Reality – it was the perfect place for me to make my first comment:

Your post is “in time” for my moment in life. I have been enmeshed in Chapel Perilous and it all came to a sudden slam against the walls of reality. I have experienced more in this little room of changes than I can recall in my very busy “normal life”. I entered this “god forsaken place” back in May …. and it didn’t matter where I ran to, I was always within the walls of confusion. Each day brought answers that were definite and different than the day before. I finally had to accept that the answers were always changing and no thing was to be true or trusted. I finally stopped running and stayed within a confined environment that seemed to be off the radar of the hustle and bustle of the world around me. 9/9/9 …. was the night I learned of alchemy, and the computer became alive with something on the “other side” showing me a brilliant display of ability I had only seen in the movies and believed to be special FX. I had a human being behave in terms of a 180 (again) and attempt to impose a belief that I knew not to be true of my character…..so when the door was closing ….the last words I heard was …..”Where is my ID?” I tore everything apart till I cut my fingers open deep with a knife, bleeding over the papers covering the floor, I broke the lock on the door, I pulled the lights out of the wall and tore every ballast apart, questioning the reason of an outside fixture indoors, I took a knife to my laptop and dismantled it piece by piece, especially focusing on the bottom notification “strike zone” I pulled the mirror off of the wall, and went through articles of clothes, I put numbers together and called to reach NOS and dialed the patterns and the numbers I put together, only to be connected to the Republican Party, or a college that had a number for the bank closings, or to be given a code that was something along the lines of URNM13…….I looked in the microwave, stove, under the sinks, the stove tops, the refrigerator, and I found a red light blinking and cut the wire to the air-conditioning that was protruding from a strange place. How did I know what I was looking for, when I have never looked before, no knowledge of what I should find once I find it…..if I ever find it? I had to be diligent, smart, and time efficient and put things back together before anyone may hear my disturbance. I stopped, and found a gift left for me…..a DVD of a Beautiful Mind…. now 9/11/09 and I just sobbed. I really fucked myself. I couldn’t leave the room because I ruined the handle and lock, I couldn’t get cool air on a hot day, I had no computer to do my work, and I had no one I could call for help and explain what I had done…..so out of character …. so out of my mind. I can only do small things to be “normal” again. Eat, sleep, exercise, study, write, and crawl out of the depths of despair, remembering I was the one who had it all…..or did I?

Published in: on September 14, 2009 at 8:07 PM  Leave a Comment  
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